Kids & Photos... never goes as planned!


It's not to often lately that I'm the parent that is getting her kids photographed. I'm usually the one taking their photos on my phone and rarely breakout my own equipment on them. Why that is as a photographer, I have no idea! But when the opportunity arose for my daughter to be a model for another photographer, I became the behind the scenes mom trying to get my daughter to do all the cute things that I'd thought she do... Boy was I in for an awakening!

 I was the mom who thought my kid would be PERFECT for the shoot. That there would be so much cuteness, so much cooperation... ugh let's just say for the first 45 minutes of this photo shoot, I saw none of that. We cried, we threw temper tantrums and we didn't want to leave mom's arms.

 As I left that session, I felt so bad for the photographer. Why didn't my kid act cute? Why didn't she cooperate? There is no way she got anything cute from that session. But then I reflected back on some sessions I've done, and thought, I bet parents of the kids I've photographed thought the same thing and low and behold, we had some amazing pictures come out of those sessions.

 So here is the bold truth. When planning anything with kids, it will never go as you planned!

 However, it will be amazing! I can tell you, the more natural you let the kids go, the more sentimental the shot is. It's capturing the true character of the child, and that is what you want.

 So this morning, I thought about my experience as a photographer and as a mom and I knew I just had to put together a post about how you as a parent can get the best out of your sessions when it comes to kiddos. I'll break it down into a couple different areas including general tips, tips for different ages and tips for special situations.

 GENERAL TIPS



  • Have patience: If the session needs to go longer, I'll go longer. As a mom, I know the kids aren't going to listen 100%, do exactly what we want them to do, or smile with every request. So if your photographer has patience, parents can stay patience too.If you start to show your discontent with them, kids will pick up on it and the entire session could become a battle.
  • Be ready: This is almost a given, but be ready for anything with kids! Expect the unexpected. They may throw up, they may have a diaper needing to be changed. But they may also give me the best laugh, smile, look and if you aren't ready and in the moment as a part of the photo, we could lose out on a great shot.
  • Get down to their level: As a short gal, I'm already at their level... but I will also get down on my knees to talk to your child so they aren't intimidated by another adult. I recommend the same for parents. Talk to them at their level vs towering over them. It's more intimate and you will be amazed how a conversation between parent and child can become a cherished picture! ( i.e. It wasn't my plan to be in any of the photos, but when my daughter was crying, I got down on the ground with her and starting singing "You are my sunshine" to her and she instantly stopped. How precious would it have been to see that captured in a picture? True B/W photo of something only she and I knew)
  • Be a goofball: I’ve often been told that I’m good with kids during sessions because I get silly with them. I make fart noises and silly faces. I play with puppets with them. I get down in the sand and play. Too often we adults worry about our dignity and how we “look” – throw all that out the window and get over yourself and let go a little, Give yourself permission to be a GOOFBALL for a little while. Who knows you might actually have some fun!
  • Let them run the session, don’t try and control it: Really, you will never be in control anyway so why not relinquish it right from the start and call a spade a spade. The child is in charge and will run the session, so the sooner you accept that the more fun you’ll both have. Here’s a few DOs and DON’Ts.
  • DON’T try and make them do anything
  • DON’T get upset with them if they don’t follow your plan
  • DON’T, for heaven’s sake yell at them, especially if they are your kids or family. That will only serve to make them hate getting photos done and they will make it even harder next time. That only leaves the child feeling like they’ve been bad and you frustrated.
  • DO go with the flow. Take whatever happens and go with it.
  • DO be ready. See #2 above!
  • DO approach it from a perspective of having fun, not one of getting the best photos. 

    •  PLANNING THE SESSION      
    Scheduling 
    I recommend that parents schedule their newborn sessions before the baby arrives to make sure they have a spot on my calendar!  Contact me during your first or second trimester and I can mark you down. I prefer to book a date 5 to 7 days after your due date. I know that most babies do not arrive on that date, but it gives me an idea of when the session will actually happen. Put my name and number on the official “baby is here” call list and we can make arrangements for a time for the session.

    Arrival Day!
    Newborn sessions should be scheduled within the first 14 days of life. Though, the best time is between 4-7 days after their arrival. Babies tend to do better in the sessions within the first 7 days of their life because they sleep most of the time. The more they sleep the easier it is for us to move them around into the sweet sleepy newborn poses. Keep in mind that colic and baby acne starts to appear around 14 days. Let’s see that little bundle early!

    Locations There are several locations your newborn session can take place. Many newborn sessions take place in your home. Don’t be worried if your house is a mess; I understand that you JUST had a baby! You probably have dishes in the sink, baby items all over the living room and dirty clothes piled up. I'll will work around everything. I love taking family photos on mom & dad’s bed, so make the bed. I also love shooting in the nursery, especially if it is beautifully decorated.

    If the weather is warm, your session can take place outdoors. I can use the cute buckets, blankets and capture a nature background!

    If you are only looking for just newborn shots and no family, you are welcome into my home for photos!


     Displaying Your Images  Think about where you want to display your images. Do you want them hanging on the nursery walls? Will they be in frames in the living room? Will they be displayed in a collage of photos on the stairway wall? Let us know so we can shoot specifically for your ideas. It will also help us know if there are specific colors I should be using to fit the style of your home……this leads us to planning for props. Please let me know if there are specific colors you would like to use in the images. I have a collection of blankets, wraps, baskets, knit hats and headbands available for parents to use. You are also welcome to use any of your own props. Items with color and texture help make unique images. If you have toys, hats, props or family heirlooms you would like to use in the session, please let me know so we can advise on what will work best. You just had a baby, so pamper yourself! Feel free to get your hair, nails and makeup done; or even have someone come to you! Go get a massage to help you feel and look super relaxed. Keep your clothing simple.
    • Parents are the most important “props” baby has. Mom should feel beautiful. We suggest short or long sleeves to flatter. Light colored, solid tops. Long dress with a light pattern for whimsy and softness. The significant other can wear a solid shirt complimentary to mom’s color. A subtle pattern on the shirt can add interest, like a striped button down. 
    • Siblings should be in solid, neutral colors (cream, white, grey) to keep focus on the baby.
    • Baby will be naked for some of the images. This is the one time in their life it is ok to be photographed nude. Wraps, blankets and diaper covers can be used on the baby. Keeping everyone else in neutral colors will keep the focus on baby when they are swaddled in a colorful wrap. We do not recommend using newborn outfits because they tend to be too big and cover their face when parents hold them. However, if grandma made a special outfit, let’s take a few shots! 
    BEFORE I ARRIVE


     We Love Light! Natural light is the most flattering. Before I arrive, please have all your curtains and blinds open. Once I arrive I will do a quick walk through of your home looking for the best natural light for us to set up our mini studio. Sometimes the best location is in the kitchen or by a deck door; usually wherever there is a large window.


     Babies Love Heat!  It is recommended that you keep your home a little warmer than usual for the session. Newborns are used to being in 98.6 degree temp of your womb. I want them to be comfortable when I get those cute naked baby shots. Heat also helps them sleep better. We will be hot, but the baby will love it!


     Prepping Baby 
    • About 30 minutes before the session, please loosen up your baby’s diaper. This allows the little imprint marks time to disappear. Your baby will be naked in some of the shots, so we want the red marks to go away. 
    • Because I want the baby sleepy for the session, I recommend that you try to keep your baby awake for a while before the session. Trust me, it will be worth it! 
    • I love “milk drunk” babies! Please feed and burp the baby right before the session to ensure baby is happy and sleepy. I may ask you to nurse (or feed) the baby during our session if they start to get cranky. 
    • Gather all the props you would like to use during the session. 
    DURING THE SESSION
    • Silence is Golden! During the session we need to have the house/location quiet to keep the baby asleep. If you have other children that might create noise, try to find a sitter that can take them from home for a few hours. If you have a pet, you may want to do the same. I will create white noise while  I am there. If you plan to have children a part of the session, I recommend bringing them in the beginning or end of the session and then have someone take them. Only those being photographed should be at the session. 
    • Relax! I am comfortable working with newborns. The baby may get fussy, but I will get great shots; sometimes it just takes time to calm down the little bundle of joy. I let the baby take the lead. Sometimes the baby will need to eat, get a new diaper and just need to cuddle with mama. Babies know when the parents are stressed, so keeping the environment mellow and calm helps to keep the baby calm. 
    • Shit happens! Literally! Because the baby will be naked we may see them use the blankets as a diaper. It is ok. We clean up and move on. There is no need to feel embarrassed. As a mom myself, I have been peed on before! It would be helpful if you had a stack of old towels, extra wipes and blankets on hand just in case things get messy. 
    • Safety Dance! Your baby is in safe hands. If there is ever a point during the session where you become uncomfortable, please let us know. We will not put the baby in unsafe positions, even if the parent wants to get a specific pose! If we feel it is unsafe, we will not proceed. The baby’s safety comes first. 
    Toddlers & Young Ones
    •  When choosing a time with the photographer, make sure you work around your child’s nap and feeding schedules.
    •  Let the kids know about the shoot in advance. Make it a special outing, maybe with a special treat of ice cream or a trip to pick out a toy afterward.
    • Bribery is ok. Bring a treat for your kids in the car for right after the shoot! Some photographers will bring treats for the kids to choose from afterward, but not all of them will.
    • Try to stay out of the photographers way. Let your photographer call the shots and direct your kids. Your job as a parent is to look at the lens and be ready to smile. I have taken so many photos where mom isn’t looking at the camera because she is busy adjusting her kids clothing or giving them directions. Let your photographer take charge and connect with your kids, they often listen better to another adult anyway!
    • Try not to focus on the final product, try to enjoy the experience, it will show in your photos. I know photo shoots are stressful, especially for mom, but try to embrace that life isn’t perfect and don’t try to get the perfect photo! Let go of expectations….the perfect family photo may not necessarily be the one you envision…if you are relaxed your children will be too!!
    Special Circumstances
    If you child is perhaps on the spectrum, has social disorders or any other situation that makes them anxious or need more time, talk to your photographer.

     I, myself, have a son who is on the spectrum for Autism. Socially around adults he is fantastic, but can easily get stressed and distant when he feels that something isn't going well. So, knowing this with him, we make arrangements for breaks, positive feedback and other fidget sessions for him during shoots. Your child may have some of these same items or may not trust others and that can be hard when they don't know me.

     Your best move is to talk with your photographer about your child's needs so that planning can be done to allow for more time, special comforts or key words to use. Often times, I take the first 10 minutes to just play with new kids that I'm shooting. I bring bubbles and toys and just spend time to let them get to know me. Many times, I let them take a picture of the family first so they get the satisfaction of hearing the click and seeing the picture themselves.